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I hope Neil has a really nice & chilled out break. I had tickets for the Pompey gig on the 11th and I was wondering how the hell they were going to manage doing the show and how knackered they would be.

So actually I'm pleased Neil has been told to take a break and chill. I hope Neil only comes back and tours when he's 100% ready. It actually takes longer than you think to recover form these kind of things. Its much better to overdo the rest than underdo it.

I had about 2 months off straight after my honeymoon for nervous exhaustion!! Nothing like what you're thinking right now!!

Put you're feet up Neil and chill!

Whenever I feel low, the one line that helps me more than any other (music, poetry or literature)is one of yours.

Colour is its own reward.

It tells me however bleak things may be, look for the light and shade, the nuances of life, the clarity and purity of something real and true and relief will follow.

Rest. Be well. You are much loved. Come back to us only when you are ready.


I wish I could come up with something to say that would help you out in this. Your words have helped me so I'd love to return the favor. I've had a friend take his life and I still to this day do not understand why. I choose to remember who they were and not some final deed. All of us can only speculate on how you are feeling but I just hope you know know you have "Frenz" here regardless if we know you personally or not. I wish nothing but the best to you and yours.

Your friend,

James Fogel
Awww...Neil~It just goes to show how much you are and always be admired for more than your music!
I hope Sharon and the kids are taking care of you and that your are taking it easy.
Your music has impacted us in more ways than you can imagine and we just want you to be at your best for the next 'how-ever-many' albums/tours!
We Love you~Laura/KY/USA
PS~Just know that my avatar speaks volumes for my love of you.... Razzer
pain is a journey. there is an end. look forward. turn your pain into sweet music like you always do.

Neil, take care of yourself. take as long as you have to. my thoughts are with you now in your hour of need.

your words helped me when times were bad - i hope all our words bring you comfort at this sad time.

Neil --

Like a lot of others here I wish I could do something from half a world away to pick you up the way your music has done for me over the last few years. Of course, my ability to wax poetic is kind of limited, so my tastes would run more toward buying you a Steinlager and telling some of my grand-dad's dirty jokes (the ones he would tell at the table at Christmas dinner).

Take care, get yourself recharged, and do what you need to to get through this rough time. We'll still be here when you're ready.
When such a tragedy happens one believes that happiness is not possible again.Time heals most bounds and happiness comes back after all even we can�t imagine it. What can I say, I am glad you are grieving now, when it happened. Could aswell have kept singing onstage hiding your grief that would explode later and worser. It�s the natural process. Hope you find in your surroundings and inside yourself the way to deal with it all and leave the black cloud behind.
Big hug from Argentina
Originally posted by pfellah:
[qb] my ability to wax poetic is kind of limited, so my tastes would run more toward buying you a Steinlager and telling some of my grand-dad's dirty jokes (the ones he would tell at the table at Christmas dinner).
Sounds outstanding to me, Jay! Smiler

Lighting another candle for Captain Neil from all of the way over here...knowing that he'll do what's best for him and his family.
Reckon we'd all swim through eel-infested waters to see him play again when he's ready, whenever that may be.
Take care of your fine self, Sir.xo
Neil, what an inspiration you have been. You have brought people together for the some of the best times in their lives; you have been there in spirit and song through some of the most painful; and your songwriting is strong and pure.

Surround yourself with people who make you feel good, and see if you can have the cup "half-full". Life goes on and things will get better, however you will need to take as much time as you want to heal yourself and be there for others sharing the same grief. Don't take this all on yourself - others will be there to take your hand.

Your music has had a most profound effect on my adult life - I only wish I could do as you do, and raise a smile and fond memories through words.

Take care of yourself - be kind to yourself - and thank you for giving me so much a part of your life through song. It's now time for me to stop taking from your music, and start wishing wellness back to the musician.

See you when you are back on stage. Don't let the turkeys get you down.

I cannot presume to give you advice on how to heal from your tragic loss. All I can add to the well wishes and love coming your way from all of us, is that time will ease the pain. At least it did when a dear friend of mine was murdered. The suffocating emotional pain and anger eventually melted away until I could finally think about my friend without tears, but rather with a smile.

Much love and best regards,
You have devoted so much of your life to entertaining us, and your music has been a tower of strength for so many people. I know you can feel the love from all of us. We all want to give something back to you now in your time of need.

Our prayers are with you in this difficult time.

Go and climb Lion Rock, watch the sun set, and enjoy the light of this wondrfull country.

All the best mate.
All my Love,
It has been asked often on this forum "how do we heal the healer?" You have cheered me, saddened me and uplifted me- now, when I need it most, and as you have done for 20 years.

It is your words I listen to with fond memories or new tears (maybe a bit of wailing).

It is to your music my 5 yo has today performed his own version of 'Locked Out' with his 2 yo sister on keyboards (???), followed up by Something So Strong, where I had to join him for the harmonies and watch thereafter as he attempted his first cartwheel.....(and I know its not *your* fault he's asking for a drum kit ::joy:: )...

You are helping me through this- please know so many are thinking of you.

Take it easy mate - we're not goin' anywhere. Smiler
Neil -- i don't know that'll you read this, but somehow putting out there may help...Paul's passing brought back memories of when my best friend chose to end her life 9 years ago.

� Drowning in "Everybody Hurts" by REM
� Not sleeping and when I did sleep, I dreamt of her
� Wondering what the hell to do with all the memories -- wondering what they were worth...what they meant.
� Thinking that it wasn't real. that maybe she was just checking out of the world for a while, moving to Alaska or something to go live off the grid.
� Waiting for a letter to arrive in the mail that had all the answers, that somehow she would've done that.
� Being terribly sad that she didn't call me before she left.
� And it totally changing my view on god.

Take it easy my old friend. Sometimes you need to be in darkenss before you can find the light. It's gonna be ok.

Neil...I have loved everything about you from the moment I heard "Mean to Me" in 1986. I made it my business to gather every possible article, poster, record, single, whatever that you and the band were featured in. Then, as I grew up and had my kids, my music was slowly replaced by theirs and then I get out my CH records and you are still there singing to me. Like you always did.

Now, while you rest and recover and find time for you, I, along with all the other frenz, will still be here, for you, like we always were.

Take care, get well...Paul is watching out for you.

love Shaani
I can imagine what you are feeling with Paul's death and a tour to manage.
I use to say that death is part of life but when it's happen, it's not so simple.

Anyway, have a big rest, think of you first, and even if I'm very disappointed about the french concert's cancellation, I hope to see you again one day (not in 10 years time !).

Take care
All the hopes and wishes above could have been mine. I, like many, would love to some day meet you. I saw Crowded House live at Sydney's Horden Pavillion in the late 80s. Paul was such a great performer, so funny. You were all good. You've had an amazing career and I wish you well for the remainder!
I wrote a song which I am about to do a basic recording of, a tribute to Hessie from the perspective of fans, family and friends. Here are the lyrics below. I hope that if you get to read this, nothing in it offends you in any way. If so please let me know.


�copyright 2005. Adam Pulsford. All rights reserved.

(Blues/rock style with acoustic guitar or full band)

We really love ya Paul
Your laugh we saw
Really miss ya Paul
Love ya Paul

You hid those demons
The light gone behind your door

Never leave us Paul
At your feet we fall
Tap foot on floor
At your feet we fall

Hope the kids understand
So sad they can�t hug Dad any more

Give Neil and Nick the beat
Swing those sticks!
Your laugh is so neat
But how can we listen without you in the mix?


Succumb to the darkness
So you won�t hurt any more
Now we cry and celebrate
The beauty of the man, that one called Paul

Give Neil and Nick the beat
Swing those sticks!
Your laugh is so neat
But how can we listen without you in the mix?

To receive a recording of this song in WMA format please email
Central Coast, NSW, Australia. Ph: 0412 309 584
Well how can one NOT add their 2 cents to a thread like this?

The internet can be such a negative place and it's a testiment to YOU, Neil, as an artist and a person, that your fans have been able to come together in this virtual place to share stories, laugh, cry - in fact, run the gamut of emotions, but most of all comfort each other in the smallest of ways. You are our figurehead - for lack of a better term. (wow, heavy on the lacking actually - oh well)

It's lovely to witness how many of us have found comfort in your music - and also so sad to realize that many of us are not only mourning Paul, but have had people close to us commit suicide - and know from first hand experience - a little bit of what you must be going through. Many of us ache to return the favor and offer you the smallest bit of comfort or tiniest piece of joy in return.

Good Lord, imagine if we all had your address, there'd be a list of people on housecleaning duty, laundry detail, baskets of cookies arriving at every moment, hot meals, a full fridge, flowers, chauffers and a hot pot of tea on the hour every hour. And it would still never be enough to show you how much we love you and care about you or even begin to repay you for everything you have given us over the years.

I am so glad that you are taking the time to be with Sharon and the boys. Take care of yourself.

You are our treasure.

xoxoooxox (take as needed)

I have been thinking long and hard about posting a message to you on this site. Least of all as I don't know you, but also because I didn't want to sound contrived or trite. After being at the Royal Albert HaLL ON THE 30/04,however, watching the extremely brave performance, and reducing me to tears during Better Be Home soon, I felt I had to write.

Please don't apologise for having to take time out. If your body is telling you to slow down, its doing it for a reason, so just chill and do whatever you need to do. There's no rush to get back out on tour, anyone who has lost someone will know what you are going through, fans will wait. I waited until 1992 to see you in concert, well worth the wait, as have been the other 5.
Anyway, to continue, I have been a massive fan since dancing to I Got You at my first school disco, and various of your songs have meant a lot at various times. School, university, and later life have all been linked to lyrics from one song or the other.
I just want to say thank you for over 20 years of music, 18 of those being accomnpanied by quite a crush !!!
Thanks for playing 'Lester' at Colston Hall, Bristol in 2001, its always been the song that reminded us of our late dog!
See you in Portsmouth,
Feels weird writing a public message to someone you know so much through music and various media - but who really is a complete stranger...

I was at the RAH on the Monday with my sister - having found out about Paul via this and forums....
Speaking for both of us, once we found out the concert was on, we didn't know how you would manage to sing/play. And to be honest we still don't. Tears choked us through much of the show.

What a range of raw emotion that night....anger, immense sadness, guilt....and God knows what else I couldn't even begin to comprehend. Thank YOU for your strength to share that with us, easing our grief (and yours!?) with music.

Rest, relax, love and enjoy your family and home - and grieve in private.

Return anew in June, and money (and sister permitting - oops, and babysitter - t'other half only likes Sinatra and Xmas songs ;D ), maybe even see you in Portsmouth.

Sara (and Lou)
Just a quick get well soon message to Neil. Obviously it has been a very difficult time for everyone who has been affected by what happened but I suppose we cannot even beging to imagine how much harder it has been on those close to Paul.

I had the good fortune of seeing the 1st Finn Bros show late last year at the Palais (my last gig before leaving home). It was a brilliant show, and made even more so with the appearance of Paul and Liam and Elroy. The memories of it now are even more precious for me.

Get well soon Neil. All the best.

Just another person wishing you, Tim and all your friends my heart's best wishes. I lost someone close to me by their own hand, and its horrible and sad and frustrating and blah! Giving you a hug and putting my face in the morning sun and hoping that you are turning yours in the same direction. Your all in my thoughts and close to my heart.
Dearest Neil,

Gather your loved ones around you and drink in the love that they give - and rest assured we have a well of our own for you and it will never run dry - it is a continuous trickle, flow, gush and even tidal wave - it stretches to the ends of the earth and above.
It's great news that you are caring for Paul's Lozzie - I'm sure Paul is up there hanging out with your Lester..
Take care and give Sharon our love
I know Paul is with us - I can feel him everywhere

Love Always
Dear Neil,
Two years ago, one of my best friends died from a snowboarding accident in France, he was only 25. The confusion and the heartache is unbearable when you lose someone so quickly and without warning. And it takes a lot of time to get over, maybe you never really do, but there will come a point when you can look back at all the good times and smile. I didn't know it then, but I know it now. My friend is still, and always will be, a great part of our lives - as Paul will be to yours. Take time to grieve and rest, be with your family and friends and above all else look after yourself. Don't worry about your fans. If they are true fans, they'll understand. xxx

Our hearts go out to you and Tim at this terrible time. Take this time to look after yourself, forget about work and spend time with the family.
You were an inspiration at the Albert Hall the other week and we felt for you throughout. Thank you so much for taking the time to play for us and write to the fans. But your health is all important and you need to think about some quality YOU time now. Can only imagine what the past few weeks have been like for you and Paul's other friends and family and it will take some time to come to terms with what has happened. I hope it is a comfort to know that so many people loved Paul and are celebrating his life and music at the same time as mourning his loss. Try to look back on all the happy memories and remember the good times you shared together.

We'll be waiting for you when you feel ready to come out and play or record again. Have seen you and Tim three times in past six months and each time was a joy. Thank you for such wonderful songs and music. But don't rush back, you were right to postpone the tour and EVERYONE understood.

Now go chill! Doctor's orders!

love and prayers,

Jeremy and Nicola xx

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