I've learned a lot from relationships gone wrong...but I've learned more from the one that's finally right.
From my "wrong" relationships I learned:
--The definition of abuse and how to recognize the warning signs
--There are ways to fight fair, and ways that are unfair
--You can't rescue people who don't want to be saved, and it's too costly to try
--Being a "good partner" doesn't mean being a doormat
--It's prudent to hold back a bit, emotionally, and keep things in perspective when you're an emotional person...it will only help you later on
--There is a difference between sex and love, and you need to recognize which is which
--Sexual expression is OK as long as both people consent and nobody gets hurt
From my current one, I've learned:
--A relationship will only work out if the power balance is equal, or at least the inequities have been addressed in ways that make both parties comfortable
--Starting as friends is the ONLY way to go
--You have to be in a relationship where you can say ANYTHING you have to say, HONESTLY...or the relationship won't work
--Compromise is necessary from both people at times...knowing WHEN is KEY
--You need to be able to laugh in bed. When you're getting frisky and a beagle starts licking your face, it's FUNNY!
--Both people need to have friends and outside interests to keep them feeling fulfilled, and help them maintain individuality
--You get out of your relationship only as much as you put into it yourself...sow love, reap love...be thoughtful, reap thoughtfulness...etc.